Thursday, December 6, 2007

My Grandmother.

I come here today with a sad heart. But I am content also. My grandmother passed away this morning. You might wonder why I am content. Well, for starters, she was sick for a long time. And she was grieving the loss of my grandfather, 4 short months ago. I know that my grandmother is healthy now, and very happy because she is with my grandfather.
I have alot to say, and I feel like it may be jumbled, but I am just typing as things come to my mind.
My parents divorced when I was, maybe 18 months old. My memories growing up are of summer trips to Idaho, and of winters where my grandparents came down here in their motorhome to visit us. We usually spent about 3 weeks in Idaho. One with my dad, and the other 2 with grandma and grandpa. We went hiking in the woods behind their cabin in McCall to look for Huckleberries. Mmmm. Most of mine didn't end up in the bucket. We also were a short walk to the beach of Payette Lake. We used to go down and play in the sand. There were lots of times when we would just sit on the porch quietly and listen to nature. A couple of times we would see deer venture into the yard. That was pretty cool. I always felt safe there.
When they came down in the winter, it was such a special treat. We got to hang out in their motorhome and just listen to music. I can hear it now as I type. "Roses are red, my love..." "I was waltzing with my darling, to the Tennessee Waltz...". I have an eccelctic taste in music, partly in thanks to my granparents. I also remember running to the motorhome, when I heard the call of my grandmother saying she had made muffins. Oh! Her muffins were the best. You haven't had strawberry shortcake until you've had it served over her muffins. Mmmm. I can smell them now....
My grandparents had one of those loves that was strong and silent. You didn't really think about it, but you knew it was there. This past summer, I was blessed to be in Idaho when my grandma was diagnosed with cancer. She needed a kidney to be removed. I say I am blessed, because I was able to witness my grandfather's love for his wife. He was so broken, worried he was going to lose her. But she made it. My grandfather and I shared a moment that made our bond secure, and showed me his love for my grandma. One month later, he passed from complications of a stroke. I really think the Lord knew that he wouldn't be able to see her go to Heaven and leave him here. He needed to be there to greet her.
My grandma was diagnosed with Alzheimer's not too long ago. After grandpa died, I think she was trapped in reliving her memories of their life together, and she just wanted to be with him. His birthday is this Saturday, and my mom told me that she believes grandma wanted to be there for his first birthday in Heaven.
My grandparents taught me alot. To be a strong person and to stand up for your beliefs. To also have humor in life. To sit back on the porch once in awhile, and enjoy a pop. Just breathe in life. I love them so much.
I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I am the only member. My grandparents accepted that. My faith teaches that families can be together forever. I know that I will be with them again. And I know they are looking down on me. I also believe that when it's my turn, grandma will be there waiting...with a batch of muffins. I love you grandma!
Here are some pictures:
Grandma and Ethan. He was 6 months old.

Adam, Shawna, Grayson, Grandma, Dean, Carter, Ethan and me. All her grandkids. This was taken in August, 2007

Me, Ethan and Grandma, morning of grandpa's funeral.

Sorry if this was really long, but I needed to do this. I hope you read it all. Thanks for listening.


Sarah said...

I am really glad that you can look at something that is sad (for us) in such a positive way. I am also glad that you can be comfortable with bearing your testimony about the whole thing. It makes my heart happy to know that YOU know that this life is not all that we have. Thanks!

Crystal said...

Hey Cari,

You have such a huge heart and such a love for everyone that you come into contact with. I admire your strength. My mom told me she read this post from you and she got all choked up. I know in my heart that your grandparents are wrapping their arms around each other and listening to the sweet words the missionaries are sharing. Look forward to the day you can do Temple work for them. I love you! Stay strong, if you need me, call me!